Featured Post from Retire with Equity

Money vs Memories in Retirement

What brings us more comfort?

Oct 22, 2024

6 min

Sue Pimento
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Summary: This article explores whether or not money or memories will bring more comfort to the elderly. It is written with the underlying assumption that there is already enough money to meet basic living expenses. 


As we age, the question of what will bring us the most comfort in our twilight years becomes increasingly relevant. For many, it comes down to two key aspects: money and memories. On the one hand, financial security provides a foundation of comfort, ensuring that one’s needs are met without the fear of lacking resources. On the other hand, cherished memories bring emotional warmth, helping individuals navigate the often-challenging aging journey.


In this article, we will explore which of these two — money or memories—plays a more significant role in delivering comfort in old age, assuming one has enough financial resources to cover basic living expenses.


While I appreciate that good health takes precedence over money and memories, we unfortunately do not have complete control over our health. However, we have control over our decision to save our money to give us comfort.  Or we can choose to spend our money to create memories that will provide us with comfort.


Financial Security: A Foundation for Comfort


Money is a powerful enabler, allowing us to meet our needs and desires. It's particularly important in the context of aging because it can mitigate many of the hardships of growing older.


1. Access to Quality Healthcare: One of the most significant concerns for elderly individuals is health. With aging comes a higher likelihood of chronic conditions, disabilities, and the need for regular medical attention. Financial security allows individuals to afford quality healthcare, access advanced treatments, and have the freedom to choose the best facilities. Having sufficient money provides a critical safety net for those who experience sudden medical emergencies or need long-term care.


2. Comfortable Living Arrangements: As people age, they often face the decision of where to live. While some prefer to stay home, others may move to assisted living facilities or hire caregivers. Financial resources enable elderly individuals to choose comfortable living environments tailored to their needs and preferences. A well-maintained home, access to mobility aids, or a peaceful retirement community can significantly enhance an individual’s day-to-day life.


3. Freedom and Autonomy: Financial independence in old age allows for greater autonomy. With money, elderly individuals can control their lives by making choices that suit their preferences, such as travelling, pursuing hobbies, or supporting loved ones. The ability to make decisions about healthcare, leisure, or everyday living preserves dignity and independence, both of which are central to feeling comfortable and fulfilled.


4. Reducing Stress and Anxiety: Aging can bring about several uncertainties, especially health and mobility. However, financial security can significantly reduce the stress and anxiety of worrying about the future. Knowing that expenses, including potentially unforeseen ones, are covered allows elderly individuals to focus on enjoying life rather than constantly fretting over how to afford their basic needs. This peace of mind is invaluable in ensuring a comfortable old age.


While money plays a crucial role in creating a foundation of comfort, it has emotional and psychological well-being limitations. This is where memories come into play.


Memories: Emotional Anchors in the Journey of Aging


As the years pass, memories become a primary source of emotional sustenance. They connect individuals to their past, their loved ones, and the experiences that shaped their lives. When people reflect on what matters most to them in old age, it’s often not material wealth but the moments that brought them joy, love, and meaning.


1. Emotional Fulfillment: Memories of joyful experiences, adventures, and time spent with loved ones can offer deep emotional fulfillment in old age. Recalling meaningful moments provides a sense of accomplishment and satisfaction, reminding individuals of the richness of their lives. For many, the bonds formed with family and friends, the challenges overcome, and the dreams pursued give life meaning and offer comfort in later years.


2. Connection to Loved Ones: As elderly individuals have fewer physical responsibilities, they often spend more time reminiscing. Positive memories help bridge the gap between generations, allowing the elderly to connect with their children, grandchildren, and even great-grandchildren. Sharing stories from the past strengthens family bonds and ensures that their legacy lives on, creating a sense of continuity and significance.


3. Combatting Loneliness: People may experience increased isolation as they age, particularly after losing a spouse or friends. In such times, memories serve as a balm for loneliness. Even in moments of solitude, recalling past experiences, adventures, or time spent with loved ones can bring comfort. Memories provide companionship in their own right, filling the gaps left by physical absence and reducing feelings of loneliness.


4. Identity and Self-Continuity: Our memories are integral to our identity. They help us understand who we are by reminding us of the paths we've taken, the challenges we’ve faced, and the triumphs we’ve celebrated. For elderly individuals, the ability to look back on a life well-lived reinforces their sense of self. Memories act as an anchor, helping them feel grounded as they navigate the changes that come with aging.


5. Psychological Resilience: Life is inevitably full of hardships, and old age is no exception. However, memories of overcoming past difficulties provide emotional strength and resilience. Looking back on moments of hardship reminds elderly individuals that they’ve faced challenges before and emerged stronger. This sense of resilience can be empowering in the face of the physical and emotional challenges of aging.


Balancing Money and Memories


It’s essential to recognize that money and memories are not mutually exclusive; they often complement each other. While financial security provides the external comfort and security needed to navigate old age, memories provide the internal warmth and emotional fulfillment that give life depth and meaning.


In determining which offers more comfort, it’s essential to consider an underlying assumption: there is already enough money to meet basic living expenses. In this scenario, it becomes clear that while financial resources are essential, memories are more significant.


Consider the following:


1. Life Experiences Are Often Enabled by Money: The ability to create cherished memories often depends on financial resources. Travelling, pursuing hobbies, and spending quality time with loved ones may all require money. However, the memories created from these experiences—not the money spent—bring lasting comfort. In old age, the satisfaction of having lived a rich life full of meaningful experiences often outweighs the material possessions acquired.


2. Financial Security Loses Meaning Without Emotional Fulfillment: Imagine having all the money needed in old age but lacking meaningful memories or connections to loved ones. In this case, wealth would bring only a hollow sense of comfort. With emotional fulfillment, money is likely to provide lasting satisfaction. In contrast, those with a lifetime of cherished memories may find comfort even in modest circumstances, as their inner wealth—their experiences—remains invaluable.


3. The Longevity of Memories vs. Material Wealth: As we age, our ability to enjoy material goods and external pleasures may diminish due to declining health or physical limitations. However, memories transcend physical limitations. Even if elderly individuals cannot travel or engage in once-loved activities, they can still find joy in recalling their past. In this sense, memories have a longevity that material wealth may lack.


4. Regret and Fulfillment in Old Age: Many studies have shown that people regret missed opportunities and unfulfilled relationships far more than financial shortcomings at the end of life. The things that bring peace and comfort in old age are often intangible: love, connection, purpose, and meaning. Memories of having lived a full life, having nurtured relationships, and having followed one’s passions often bring a greater sense of contentment than wealth alone.


The Enduring Power of Memories


In the context of aging, both money and memories play significant roles in creating comfort. Financial security provides the practical means to ensure health, independence, and a comfortable lifestyle, while memories offer emotional sustenance, a sense of identity, and a connection to loved ones.


At Retire with Equity, we suggest everyone create an emergency fund of at least 5% of their retirement savings. One primary purpose of this fund is to pay for unexpected healthcare needs, such as assisted living or hiring caregivers.


Given that basic financial needs are met, memories—those intangible, priceless moments—tend to provide the most incredible comfort in old age. They remind us of the richness of life, the love we’ve shared, and the experiences that have shaped who we are. While money offers external comfort, memories provide internal peace, warmth, and solace as we navigate the later stages of life.


Ultimately, what will comfort us in our golden years is not how much money we have in the bank but how much life we’ve genuinely lived.


Don't retire---Re-Wire


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Sue Pimento

Sue Pimento

Founder | CEO

Focused on financial literacy and retirement strategies. Authoring new book on home equity strategies to help seniors find financial freedom

Pension ReformInterest RatesHome EquityMortgagesReverse Mortgages

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Ringo Starr Just Turned 85

Yes, Ringo Starr just turned 85. Let that sink in. I read this in the Washington Post and felt like a bag of Beatles vinyl had walloped me. How is this possible? How can the mop-top drummer be 85 when I was dancing to “Yellow Submarine” in bell-bottoms with a brush for a microphone? More urgently: how old does this make me?! Ringo isn’t slowing down. He’s still touring with two bands, making music, flashing that cheeky Liverpudlian smile, and preaching peace and love as if he’s got nowhere else to be. No plans to retire. No plans to fade away. Just a rockstar with a great attitude... and maybe a titanium hip (unconfirmed). This made me realize that, as the birthday candles on my cake now need a fire permit, “attitude” plays a huge role in how we age. Based on the feedback I received from my last post, “What’s Your Brand, Boomer?”, it’s clear that many people are genuinely interested in managing their personal brand as they age. This week, I want to go deeper—because whether you’re 45 or 85, you are Old People in Training. That’s right. Every one of us is aging in real-time, and understanding the stages ahead—either for ourselves or our aging loved ones—helps us walk this path with humour, grace, and fewer surprises. So, here they are: The 8 (Unofficial but Uncannily Accurate) Stages of Aging 1. The Stand-Up-and-Forget-Why Stage (Kicks in around mid-to-late 50s) You walk into a room with purpose, then wonder: was I here to fold laundry, pay a bill, or practice my slow blink? Bonus points if you’re already wearing the glasses you’re hunting for. How it helps: Eases forgetfulness. It’s not early dementia; it’s early distraction. Keep a notebook or use Voice Memos. Or do what I do: shrug, laugh, and keep walking until something jogs the memory (usually coffee). 2. The “Senior? Not Unless There’s a Discount” Stage (Hits in your early 60s) You bristle at the word “senior,” unless it saves you $2.50 at the movies or 15% at Shoppers. Suddenly, age becomes a tool, not a label. How it helps: Celebrate the advantages! You’ve earned them. And remember: owning your age is the new anti-aging remedy. Confidence looks good on everyone. Remember, you are still that age, whether you admit it or not. You might as well save some money! 3. The “Yes, I Really Am That Age” Reminder Stage (Kicks in around 65) You find yourself saying your age out loud like it’s a riddle. "I’m 65. Sixty-five! Isn’t that wild?" You’re still trying to catch up with the numbers, or maybe you’re worried you’ll forget your age. How it helps: Accept the number without letting it define you. It’s not a limit — it’s a launchpad. Bonus: Use it as an excuse to do something you’ve always put off. 4. The Replacement Parts Stage (Hits in the early to mid-70s) Welcome to orthopedic roulette: knees, hips, maybe a shoulder. You collect joint replacements like frequent-flyer miles. Fortunately, modern medicine allows for joint replacements to be performed more quickly than ordering takeout. Still waiting for Staples to offer 3D-printed hips. How it helps: Embrace science instead of fighting it. Biology always prevails! Mobility equals independence. And nothing embodies “active aging” like beating your grandkids at pickleball with a shiny new titanium knee. 5. The “I’ve Run Out of F*cks to Give” Stage (Kicked in the late 70s into the early 80’s) You’ve earned the right to speak your mind—and wear socks with sandals. You say what you want, mean what you say, and anyone who doesn’t like it can take a number. Opinions? Too many! Filters? Deleted. Freedom? Glorious. Friends? Running for cover! How it helps: This is peak freedom. Use it wisely. Advocate, participate, mentor, and model what unapologetic living looks like. You’re the elder statesperson now—be bold, not bitter. 6. The Cataract Conspiracy Stage (Kicks in mid-to-late 70s) Lights appear like halos, and reading menus becomes an Olympic event. But don’t worry—cataract surgery is so common it’s practically an oil change. And voilà: brighter colours, more precise lines, less squinting. Spoiler Alert: You will now be able to see how poor your housekeeping skills are! How it helps: Get your eyes checked. Don’t delay. Seeing clearly again can literally brighten your outlook—and maybe even your attitude. 7. The “Say What?” Stage – The Hard-of-Hearing Stage (Late 70’s+) This one sneaks up like a whisper… which is ironic, because you probably won’t hear it. At some point, for most of us, hearing begins to decline like old payphones and eight-track tapes. It might start with missing parts of conversations in noisy restaurants or asking people to repeat themselves (just once… or five times). Eventually, it’s full-blown “Say what?” territory. Many avoid wearing hearing aids because—let’s face it—they feel like a flashing neon sign that says, "I’m old!" But here’s the real issue: pretending to hear is much worse. It can lead to social withdrawal, isolation, and even strained relationships. And we’re not just making this up for dramatic effect—studies at John Hopkins School of Medicine show that untreated hearing loss is linked to a higher risk of dementia, depression, and cognitive decline.   There’s also the loud TV effect—when your neighbours across the street can hear your Netflix queue, it’s time to see an audiologist, not to mention the safety concern: driving with impaired hearing is risky; sirens, honking horns, or even a warning from a passenger might go unnoticed. So, if your “What?” count is rising and your TV volume is climbing towards aircraft-engine decibels, take action. Getting your hearing tested doesn’t mean you’re old—it means you’re informed (and honestly, more enjoyable to be around).  Because nothing celebrates “vibrant aging” more than staying connected to the world—and actually hearing it. Stage 8: The Long Goodbye – When Friends Start to Leave the Stage I’ve heard from seniors about Stage 8… and without exception, they say it’s one of the toughest parts of aging.  This is the stage when the long goodbye starts—quietly at first, then with increasingly frequent moments. Your phone rings less often. The chairs at the coffee group gradually empty. One day, you realize you’re not just losing friends—you’re outliving them. It’s part of the circle of life, for sure—but no Lion King soundtrack can ease the heartbreak. This stage exposes some of our deepest fears: Will I be next? Who will mourn me? Does anyone even know I’m still here? It’s a time of grief, loneliness, and silent despair. And while you can’t fast-forward through it, you don’t have to walk it alone. If you’re an “Old Person in Training” (which, reminder: we all are), listen up. This stage isn’t just something that happens to others—it’s your future self, waving from down the road. Learning about it now prepares you to guide others through it with grace and to soften your own landing when the time arrives. And if someone you love is already there? This is your cue. Show up. Don’t wait to be invited—grief rarely sends formal RSVPs.  Phrases or clichés like “they’re in a better place” won’t suffice here. These are nothing burgers—all bun, no meat—empty calories in a moment that needs nourishment. Show up. Stay steady. Be the evidence that they are still recognized, still cared for, still part of something meaningful.  What they truly need is presence, not presents. Time, not timelines. They need to feel they are not alone. Sit with them. Walk with them. Watch Jeopardy in silence if that’s what the day calls for. But whatever you do, don’t disappear. Because one of the most profound gifts we can give in this stage isn’t a cure—it’s companionship. Science Confirms It: Attitude Is a Lifespan Strategy Tongue-in-cheek aside, these aging observations are backed by science: Positive beliefs about aging can extend life by 7–8.5 years. (Source: PubMed – Levy et al.) Optimism correlates with lower heart disease, stroke, and a 70% greater likelihood of reaching age 85.  (Source: Harvard Health) Positive mindset boosts recovery, brain health, and resilience after illness.  (Source: Harvard Health) So, what can we learn from Ringo? Keep creating – Music, art, businesses, bad poetry. It keeps the brain limber and the soul alight. Stay curious – Sign up for that course. Take the trip. Ask questions. Enrol in the MBA. (Looking at you, 69-year-old rockstars.) Lean into joy – Laugh like nobody’s judging. Dance like your knees aren’t watching. Surround yourself with good vibes – Optimism costs nothing and glows brighter than Botox. Remember, it’s not your age—it’s your outlook. So next time you stand up and forget why you did, just grin and say: ‘I’m aging like a Beatle. Still standing. Still grooving. Still fabulous.” And if you ever need a pep talk, ask yourself:  “What would Ringo do?” Don’t’ Retire Re-wire Sue

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