Money vs Memories in Retirement

What brings us more comfort?

Oct 22, 2024

6 min

Sue Pimento


Summary: This article explores whether or not money or memories will bring more comfort to the elderly. It is written with the underlying assumption that there is already enough money to meet basic living expenses. 


As we age, the question of what will bring us the most comfort in our twilight years becomes increasingly relevant. For many, it comes down to two key aspects: money and memories. On the one hand, financial security provides a foundation of comfort, ensuring that one’s needs are met without the fear of lacking resources. On the other hand, cherished memories bring emotional warmth, helping individuals navigate the often-challenging aging journey.


In this article, we will explore which of these two — money or memories—plays a more significant role in delivering comfort in old age, assuming one has enough financial resources to cover basic living expenses.


While I appreciate that good health takes precedence over money and memories, we unfortunately do not have complete control over our health. However, we have control over our decision to save our money to give us comfort.  Or we can choose to spend our money to create memories that will provide us with comfort.


Financial Security: A Foundation for Comfort


Money is a powerful enabler, allowing us to meet our needs and desires. It's particularly important in the context of aging because it can mitigate many of the hardships of growing older.


1. Access to Quality Healthcare: One of the most significant concerns for elderly individuals is health. With aging comes a higher likelihood of chronic conditions, disabilities, and the need for regular medical attention. Financial security allows individuals to afford quality healthcare, access advanced treatments, and have the freedom to choose the best facilities. Having sufficient money provides a critical safety net for those who experience sudden medical emergencies or need long-term care.


2. Comfortable Living Arrangements: As people age, they often face the decision of where to live. While some prefer to stay home, others may move to assisted living facilities or hire caregivers. Financial resources enable elderly individuals to choose comfortable living environments tailored to their needs and preferences. A well-maintained home, access to mobility aids, or a peaceful retirement community can significantly enhance an individual’s day-to-day life.


3. Freedom and Autonomy: Financial independence in old age allows for greater autonomy. With money, elderly individuals can control their lives by making choices that suit their preferences, such as travelling, pursuing hobbies, or supporting loved ones. The ability to make decisions about healthcare, leisure, or everyday living preserves dignity and independence, both of which are central to feeling comfortable and fulfilled.


4. Reducing Stress and Anxiety: Aging can bring about several uncertainties, especially health and mobility. However, financial security can significantly reduce the stress and anxiety of worrying about the future. Knowing that expenses, including potentially unforeseen ones, are covered allows elderly individuals to focus on enjoying life rather than constantly fretting over how to afford their basic needs. This peace of mind is invaluable in ensuring a comfortable old age.


While money plays a crucial role in creating a foundation of comfort, it has emotional and psychological well-being limitations. This is where memories come into play.


Memories: Emotional Anchors in the Journey of Aging


As the years pass, memories become a primary source of emotional sustenance. They connect individuals to their past, their loved ones, and the experiences that shaped their lives. When people reflect on what matters most to them in old age, it’s often not material wealth but the moments that brought them joy, love, and meaning.


1. Emotional Fulfillment: Memories of joyful experiences, adventures, and time spent with loved ones can offer deep emotional fulfillment in old age. Recalling meaningful moments provides a sense of accomplishment and satisfaction, reminding individuals of the richness of their lives. For many, the bonds formed with family and friends, the challenges overcome, and the dreams pursued give life meaning and offer comfort in later years.


2. Connection to Loved Ones: As elderly individuals have fewer physical responsibilities, they often spend more time reminiscing. Positive memories help bridge the gap between generations, allowing the elderly to connect with their children, grandchildren, and even great-grandchildren. Sharing stories from the past strengthens family bonds and ensures that their legacy lives on, creating a sense of continuity and significance.


3. Combatting Loneliness: People may experience increased isolation as they age, particularly after losing a spouse or friends. In such times, memories serve as a balm for loneliness. Even in moments of solitude, recalling past experiences, adventures, or time spent with loved ones can bring comfort. Memories provide companionship in their own right, filling the gaps left by physical absence and reducing feelings of loneliness.


4. Identity and Self-Continuity: Our memories are integral to our identity. They help us understand who we are by reminding us of the paths we've taken, the challenges we’ve faced, and the triumphs we’ve celebrated. For elderly individuals, the ability to look back on a life well-lived reinforces their sense of self. Memories act as an anchor, helping them feel grounded as they navigate the changes that come with aging.


5. Psychological Resilience: Life is inevitably full of hardships, and old age is no exception. However, memories of overcoming past difficulties provide emotional strength and resilience. Looking back on moments of hardship reminds elderly individuals that they’ve faced challenges before and emerged stronger. This sense of resilience can be empowering in the face of the physical and emotional challenges of aging.


Balancing Money and Memories


It’s essential to recognize that money and memories are not mutually exclusive; they often complement each other. While financial security provides the external comfort and security needed to navigate old age, memories provide the internal warmth and emotional fulfillment that give life depth and meaning.


In determining which offers more comfort, it’s essential to consider an underlying assumption: there is already enough money to meet basic living expenses. In this scenario, it becomes clear that while financial resources are essential, memories are more significant.


Consider the following:


1. Life Experiences Are Often Enabled by Money: The ability to create cherished memories often depends on financial resources. Travelling, pursuing hobbies, and spending quality time with loved ones may all require money. However, the memories created from these experiences—not the money spent—bring lasting comfort. In old age, the satisfaction of having lived a rich life full of meaningful experiences often outweighs the material possessions acquired.


2. Financial Security Loses Meaning Without Emotional Fulfillment: Imagine having all the money needed in old age but lacking meaningful memories or connections to loved ones. In this case, wealth would bring only a hollow sense of comfort. With emotional fulfillment, money is likely to provide lasting satisfaction. In contrast, those with a lifetime of cherished memories may find comfort even in modest circumstances, as their inner wealth—their experiences—remains invaluable.


3. The Longevity of Memories vs. Material Wealth: As we age, our ability to enjoy material goods and external pleasures may diminish due to declining health or physical limitations. However, memories transcend physical limitations. Even if elderly individuals cannot travel or engage in once-loved activities, they can still find joy in recalling their past. In this sense, memories have a longevity that material wealth may lack.


4. Regret and Fulfillment in Old Age: Many studies have shown that people regret missed opportunities and unfulfilled relationships far more than financial shortcomings at the end of life. The things that bring peace and comfort in old age are often intangible: love, connection, purpose, and meaning. Memories of having lived a full life, having nurtured relationships, and having followed one’s passions often bring a greater sense of contentment than wealth alone.


The Enduring Power of Memories


In the context of aging, both money and memories play significant roles in creating comfort. Financial security provides the practical means to ensure health, independence, and a comfortable lifestyle, while memories offer emotional sustenance, a sense of identity, and a connection to loved ones.


At Retire with Equity, we suggest everyone create an emergency fund of at least 5% of their retirement savings. One primary purpose of this fund is to pay for unexpected healthcare needs, such as assisted living or hiring caregivers.


Given that basic financial needs are met, memories—those intangible, priceless moments—tend to provide the most incredible comfort in old age. They remind us of the richness of life, the love we’ve shared, and the experiences that have shaped who we are. While money offers external comfort, memories provide internal peace, warmth, and solace as we navigate the later stages of life.


Ultimately, what will comfort us in our golden years is not how much money we have in the bank but how much life we’ve genuinely lived.


Don't retire---Re-Wire


Connect with:
Sue Pimento

Sue Pimento

Founder | CEO

Focused on financial literacy and retirement strategies. Authoring new book on home equity strategies to help seniors find financial freedom

Pension ReformInterest RatesHome EquityMortgagesReverse Mortgages

You might also like...

Check out some other posts from Retire with Equity

6 min

I Was 33 Years Early to the ADU Party

The early 1990s were tough for many Canadians, including my partner and me. The recession of 1990-1991 hit us hard, leaving both of us without jobs and staring at an unemployment rate that had climbed to a record 10.23%. With bills piling up and options dwindling, we had to get creative—and fast. That’s when we found an unexpected lifeline in an unlikely place: my partner’s grandmother’s house. Grandma, a 90-year-old fireball from Newfoundland, was sharp as a tack and fiercely independent. However, her home was starting to feel too large for her to manage on her own. Meanwhile, we needed a place to live that wouldn’t drain our limited savings. Over cups of tea at her cozy kitchen table, a plan started to take shape: we would build a basement apartment in her house, move in, and exchange affordable rent for assistance around the house. It was a perfect win-win. I didn't know it, but I was an ADU pioneer Today, this living arrangement may be recognized as an Accessory Dwelling Unit (ADU), a secondary housing unit on a single-family property. However, in 1991, this concept was far from mainstream. For us, it was simply a matter of survival—a practical solution born from necessity. We rolled up our sleeves and got to work. With a few friends and determination, we transformed Grandma’s basement into a modest but functional living space. It was basic, even a bit wonky—you had to walk through the bedroom to get to the living room-kitchen combo—but it was ours. We managed most of the construction ourselves, and hired an electrician for the wiring and a plumber to handle the pipes. The rest was pure sweat equity. Living in that basement was an adjustment, to say the least. Space was tight, and our DIY craftsmanship wasn’t exactly HGTV-worthy. However, it provided us with a fresh start. But as ADU pioneers, we got much more than we could have imagined. A much closer connection to family. Grandma’s wit and energy were the heart of the house, and we grew closer to her than we ever imagined. Her stories about growing up in Newfoundland in the late 1800s mesmerized me. I would sit there, wide-eyed, as she recounted winters so cold that tea froze before it hit the cup and evenings illuminated by whale oil lamps. We laughed constantly, and she quickly became the grandmother I never had since my grandparents had passed before I was born. Grandma and I stayed close even after my relationship with my partner ended. I couldn’t imagine life without our Friday lunches, which became a cherished tradition. Every week, I’d visit, and she’d share more stories or critique my cooking attempts with her quick wit and that unmistakable Newfoundland twang. She continued to be a beacon of joy and wisdom in my life. Grandma thrived on independence, which she held onto with great determination. At 90 years old, she re-tarred her driveway by herself, much to the neighbours' surprise and my immense admiration. The tar application was as wrinkled as her skin, and she couldn't care less. She beamed with pride while I took her picture! She loved having visitors, and the parish clergy were frequent guests. She always welcomed them with a twinkle in her eye and a sharp sense of humour. Once, when the parish priest asked her if she ever thought about "the hereafter," she shot back, “Oh, I think about it every day when I go into the basement and ask myself, ‘What am I here after?’” That was Grandma: quick-witted, strong, and full of life. Our basement apartment was more than just a place to live; it was a lifeline. The benefits extended beyond us. Grandma stayed in the home she loved until she passed away peacefully at 96 years old, sitting at her kitchen table on my birthday. It was a poignant moment that reminded me how much she had shaped my life. The modest basement apartment not only sheltered us but also added value to her home. We inadvertently enhanced the property’s functionality and appeal by converting unused space into livable quarters. This represents a key advantage of ADUs in today’s economy. Given the housing shortages and rising costs, ADUs provide a practical solution by offering affordable rental options, increasing property values, and creating opportunities for intergenerational living. In recent years, governments have acknowledged the importance of ADUs, making it easier and more affordable for families to construct them. Changes to mortgage lending policies have been introduced to promote ADU construction. For instance, insured loans now cover up to $1.5 million, and the amortization period has been extended to 30 years, enhancing financing accessibility. Furthermore, the federal government has announced new refinancing options to allow up to 90% of the property’s value. At the same time, low-interest loans for ADU construction have doubled to $80,000, with repayment terms of 15 years. These welcome changes will lower financial barriers and assist homeowners in creating secondary housing units, addressing both affordability and housing shortages. This intergenerational arrangement we set up over three decades ago was a win-win in every way. It provided mutual support, strengthened family bonds, and created a housing solution that benefited both generations. Seniors can age in place with dignity and companionship while younger generations gain access to affordable housing and the chance to learn from their elders. The laughter, shared meals, and stories crafted memories that will last a lifetime. Moreover, ADUs can help ease housing shortages and increase the availability of affordable rentals. They represent a practical, cost-effective method to utilize existing properties better. For families, they offer flexibility—a space for aging parents, adult children, or even potential rental income. For communities, they supply essential housing stock without necessitating large-scale development. For a deeper dive into ADUs, here's a link to a post we shared last year https://expertfile.com/spotlight/10346/additional-dwelling-units--adus- What's Old is New Again It's often said that many things come back in style if you wait long enough. This may hold for ADUs, simply an old concept whose time has come again. Nonetheless, ADUs empower our younger generation to afford housing and achieve homeownership. They also provide vital support for our older generations, enabling them to age in place while generating much-needed income for a dignified retirement. Reflecting on the past, I often ponder who saved whom. Grandma’s indomitable spirit and sharp humour made every bump in the road worthwhile. She would tease me about the crooked shelves we installed and joke that our kitchen was so small we could stir the soup without getting off the couch. In truth, she gave me more than I ever gave her. Her strength, love, and unwavering sense of humour helped me navigate one of the most challenging times in my life. The quirky basement we built in 1991 may not have been perfect, but it served its purpose. Today, as ADUs gain popularity, they represent more than just housing; they embody connection, resilience, and finding creative solutions to life’s challenges. Whether it’s a basement apartment, a backyard cottage, or a garage conversion, ADUs can foster connection and help families thrive—just as we did all those years ago. And as for Grandma? She demonstrated that a touch of humour, plenty of love, and the occasional jab at a priest could keep anyone young at heart. Every time I think of her now, I can’t help but smile and wonder if, somewhere, she’s still re-tarring driveways and asking herself, ‘What am I here after?’ Don’t Retire … Re-Wire! Sue

5 min

Additional Dwelling Units (ADUs)

Summary: In a previous post, I wrote about the need for more creative solutions to the cost of housing.  I also spoke to the housing shortage and the steep downpayment rules we continue to face. At the same time, the need for retirement income and an increased focus on "aging in place" has more and more property owners looking for solutions.  Here, we explore why adding secondary living spaces to their properties, commonly referred to as Additional Dwelling Units (ADUs), is something you may want to consider. What Are ADUs? ADUs are fully equipped residential units situated on the same lot as a single-family home. They offer a distinct and private living arrangement while maintaining proximity to the main house. These living spaces may be integrated into the primary residence—such as a transformed garage or basement—or exist as independent structures, including small cottages or apartments. Why ADUs Are Gaining in Popularity ADUs can fulfill a broad range of needs, from accommodating aging relatives or adult children to creating a valuable source of rental income for homeowners. This income could assist seniors with cash flow and substantially boost their property's overall value. But is an ADU right for you? Before answering this, let's first take a brief look at their advantages and the rules and regulations governing the conversion or construction of such structures. Types of ADUs ADUs encompass a variety of secondary suites or dwelling units, primarily categorized as attached, detached, and semi-detached structures. Attached ADUs arise when homeowners convert existing spaces, such as basements, into livable areas. In contrast, detached ADUs consist of separate structures built apart from the principal residence. Laneway Houses / Laneway Suites: These small, detached units are constructed in the backyard or along the laneways of existing properties, maximizing the use of available space. Garden Suites: Similar to laneway houses, garden suites are secondary residences in the primary home's backyard. They offer self-sufficient living environments and are increasingly favoured for boosting housing density in urban settings while preserving the character of residential neighbourhoods. Basement Apartments: Self-contained living spaces in the basement of a residential property. These usually have a distinct entrance. In-law Units (In-law Suites, In-law Flats) are separate living sections within a single-family home that cater to relatives, providing a comfortable space for parents or in-laws. Detached Garages: These standalone structures are separate from the main house and traditionally store vehicles. They can also serve as storage areas or workshops. Adding a second-story apartment above garages is popular. Parking is premium in cities, and these structures provide the best of both worlds: keeping parking, storage, and adding living quarters above. Carriage Houses and Coach Houses: Originally designed as outbuildings on larger estates to store horse-drawn carriages, carriage houses, and coach houses have often been repurposed as living accommodations, guest houses, or rental units while maintaining their historic architecture. The Benefits of ADUs Additional Dwelling Units (ADUs) are indispensable in alleviating housing shortages and addressing affordability challenges within various communities. They also offer a wide range of personal and economic advantages for homeowners and tenants searching for budget-friendly rental options. Some key benefits include: An Aging-in-Place Option for Seniors: ADUs can allow elderly relatives to stay in their community and maintain an important sense of connection with neighbours, friends, and family. Rental Income: Homeowners can establish a dependable revenue stream with an ADU. These units represent a highly appealing affordable housing alternative. Accommodation for Adult Children: An ADU can provide temporary living arrangements to adult children who may not be able to buy into the housing market or who want to be closer to their aging parents. Dedicated Office/Creative Space: With more people working from home part-time or going entirely virtual, ADU can provide a more professional and comfortable work environment But There's Another Payoff for ADUs Beyond these apparent benefits, I'm also struck by how ADUs can help us cultivate a stronger sense of community and intergenerational connection. Let me unpack this more and list some unique attributes of ADUs that make them so vital to our housing strategy: Affordability: ADUs can also be more affordable than standalone houses, making them increasingly attractive for individuals or small families looking for budget-conscious living options. Connection: ADUs are much closer to the primary residence. This allows younger renters to forge more meaningful relationships and interactions with their homeowners (many of whom are seniors). Equity: For renters who want to move beyond an apartment or condo but lack the financial means, ADUs could present a great alternative. They also provide a unique way to give renters access to neighbourhoods where housing availability is a challenge. For young families, renting an ADU could allow them to place their children in better schools that require residency in the school district. Support: As we age, we are more likely to need help maintaining our homes. For example, help with yard work and snow removal could be traded for reduced rent.  There is much to be said about the comfort and safety of having someone live a few steps away for our older generation.  ADUs are a Key Part of the Government's Housing Strategy The Federal Government just announced the expansion of the Canada Secondary Suite Loan Program. Here's what you need to know: The loan amount has been increased to $80,000, and it has a 2% interest rate and a 15-year repayment term.  In addition to the Secondary Suite Loan Program, homeowners can refinance with insured mortgages to help cover the cost of adding a secondary suite, starting January 15, 2025. Lenders and insurers will begin allowing mortgage refinancing of up to 90 percent of the post-renovation value of their home up to $2 million, amortized for up to 30 years. Homeowners can use this loan program and mortgage financing to help cover the cost of adding a secondary suite. These developments should get us all thinking more about the possibilities of ADUs. The benefits for many people and the clear intergenerational win-win exchanges are compelling. Given the impact they could yield for seniors in unlocking the value of their home equity and the compelling social benefits they offer for communities, I'll be exploring ADUs in much more detail over the coming year. Stay tuned. Don’t Retire … Re-Wire! Sue

1 min

Redefining Retirement: My Personal Journey

A big thank you to Kathy McPherson for this lovely feature—it means so much to me! This article, published in Auburn Lane speaks to the importance of reinvention.  My own journey spans a long career in finance and real estate to include recent milestones such as becoming a certified fitness instructor at 60 (and earning my second certification at 68!). Along the way, I’ve discovered not just the power of physical strength but also the importance of mental resilience and community. Fitness has been a huge part of my story. Whether I’m leading a LesMills BODYPUMP or RPM class, my goal is to show others what’s possible at any age. And yes, I still love to challenge myself—I climbed Machu Picchu at 60 and hiked to Everest Base Camp at 61! I hope my journey inspires others to step into their own second acts with confidence and purpose. If you’d like to follow along or learn more about what’s next, check out the link below. Let’s keep pushing boundaries—together. Dont' Retire... Re-Wire! Sue

View all posts