Featured Post from Retire with Equity

The H³ Plan: How to Retire Without Losing Your Mind & How You Can Support Older Relatives

Jan 12, 2026

7 min

Sue Pimento

MEDIA ADVISORY

Retirement planning expert Sue Pimento introduces her H³ Plan — a research-backed framework for maintaining mental and emotional health in retirement that goes beyond financial planning. The framework identifies three essential pillars — Hope, Help, and Horizon — that help combat the emotional flatness many retirees experience after leaving structured work. Drawing on neuroscience research and clinical insights, Pimento offers a practical "emotional pension plan" for the growing population of Canadians navigating this life transition. Sue Pimento is available for interviews on retirement wellness, healthy aging, and the psychology of life transitions.



Retirement doesn't arrive with a crash. It arrives quietly.


One day, you stop setting alarms, stop racing against the clock, stop feeling urgently needed—and no one gives you the mental and emotional playbook for what comes next.


There should be a chapter titled:  How to Keep Your Brain Engaged, Regulated, and Not Mildly Irritated by Everyone. Instead? 404 page not found.  (Translation: the system is actively seeking guidance… and coming up empty.)


And if you're nodding along thinking "yes… exactly" — IYKYK. (If You Know, You Know. And if you don't yet, give it time.)


Understanding Your Emotional Pension Plan


After years of writing, researching, listening, and living through this stage myself, three factors consistently emerge as essential to maintaining mental and emotional health as we age.


I call it H³: Hope, Help, and Horizon.


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Here's why each one matters—and why neglecting any of them leaves you emotionally drained.

Think of them as your emotional pension plan — not optional, not fluffy, but essential.


1. Hope: Not Just Wishful Thinking — Agency, Clarified


In her reflective New York Times article, "Your Hopes," journalist and believing host Lauren Jackson examines increasing cynicism, waning trust, and—most importantly—what research indicates truly can turn the tide. 


One line sums up the difference perfectly:


Optimism is believing the future will improve. Hope is believing you can make it so.


Here's why that matters.


Optimism versus Hope (Plain-English Edition)


Optimism is passive: "Things will probably work out."

Hope is active: "I can influence what happens next."

Optimism awaits. Hope takes part.


From a psychological perspective, hope is based on:

• Agency (I am able to act)

• Pathways thinking (I can find a way)


Research from the University of Oklahoma's Hope Research Center indicates that hope is one of the strongest predictors of well-being, often surpassing income, education, and even past success.

For retirees, this distinction is important because aging narratives often aim to gently remove us from the driver's seat.


Hope replies with something more like:

Back off, sister. I refuse to buy into outdated stereotypes. I've upgraded to a more modern version of aging—like a new iPod model. (Stereos are out of style. Keep up.)


Hope maintains the nervous system in an engaged state rather than resignation.


In fact, some see hope as far more nuanced. Frank O’Dea, best known for his personal comeback story — from being homeless to later becoming a very successful coffee entrepreneur as the co-founder of the Second Cup shares his thoughts in his book, “Hope is Not a Strategy.” His personal narrative reinforces a deep belief in hope as a powerful emotional engine, but never as a substitute for action.


O’Dea, who later went on to be a co-founder of the Second Cup Coffee Company and is a recipient of the Order of Canada for his philanthropy and humanitarian work, speaks to the human tendency to confuse optimism with preparation — people often wish their way into opportunity, rather than work their way into readiness. I love this line from his book:


“Hope is important — it gives us purpose. But without a strategy, it leaves us vulnerable. We win not by wishing, but by working.”
— Frank O’Dea


2. Giving Back: Your Brain's Favourite (Unpaid) Job


Giving back isn't about virtue. Or virtue signalling on social, for that matter. (It's not a branding exercise. No hashtag required.)


It's about nervous system regulation.


Over the holidays, I was listening to an interview on CBC Radio and found myself doing that thing where you stop playing Vita Mahjong mid-game because someone said something so logical but also completely fascinating.


Gloria Macarenko’s episode with Vancouver-based psychologist and therapist Lawrence Sheppard explored in detail how giving back influences us and what he has personally observed in his practice. The message? Giving back is a key factor for mental health.

Certainly, we've all heard the well-known phrase "tis better to give than receive"—or a version of it.


But Sheppard wasn't referring to virtue or being kind. He was discussing what truly happens in the brain when we give.


Here's the short version:

Helping others shifts the brain out of threat mode and into meaning mode.

So what's Happening Neurologically?


Building on Sheppard's clinical work and broader neuroscience:

• Chronic stress forces the nervous system to stay hyper-vigilant.

• Rumination shifts inward and intensifies the sense of threat.

• Contribution shifts focus outward

• Helping activates reward pathways and emotional regulation.


Giving back restores balance.

• purpose

• structure

• connection

• competence


Giving back reminds your brain it's still engaged—just not earning money. (My definition of volunteering. Not Webster's.)


And many retirees miss that feeling more than the salary. They also miss the tangibles: vinyl records, 99-cent bread, and the quiet satisfaction of being needed somewhere at 9 a.m.

Importantly, giving back—like hope—helps regulate the nervous system by decreasing feelings of isolation and restoring a sense of predictability. Your brain prefers knowing where it belongs.


3. Something to Look Forward To: Anticipation Is Medicine


This one is sneaky powerful—and well documented.

Having something to anticipate generates excitement. And excitement is not merely a feeling.

It's a nervous system event.


Here's the connective tissue: All three pillars—hope, giving back, and anticipation—work because they shift the nervous system away from threat and stagnation, and toward engagement, reward, and regulation.


The Science (Why Anticipation Works)


Research by neuroscientist Wolfram Schultz showed that dopamine spikes most strongly before a reward—not during it. 


Later studies in affective neuroscience confirmed:

• Anticipation boosts motivation and positive emotions.

• Future-oriented thinking diminishes depressive rumination.

• Predictable positive events enhance mood regulation.


In plain English:

Your brain lights up when it knows something good is coming.

In many instances, anticipation offers more emotional uplift than the event itself.


Think:

• first date

• first kiss

• first solo trip

• first "I can't believe I'm actually doing this" moment

You cannot buy that feeling in a bottle. (Not even the little blue pill will do it.)


Why This Matters in Retirement


Work used to provide:

• deadlines

• milestones

• future orientation

• purpose

• feedback

• connection

• a sense of accomplishment


And yes—before anyone writes me a letter—stay-at-home moms, caregivers, and volunteers: that is work. Don't get me started.


When structured work concludes, those inputs aren't automatically replaced.


Without things to look forward to:

• time flattens

• mood dulls

• life becomes emotionally beige


Something—anything—on the calendar restores forward motion.


What Giving Back Looks Like in Real Life


My friend Janet retired at 63 with a solid financial plan and no emotional plan. Six months in, she was climbing the walls—bored, restless, wondering why she felt so flat when she "should" be enjoying herself. Then she started tutoring at the library (Help), signed up for a pottery course (Horizon), and realized she could actually shape this chapter however she wanted (Hope). Different person. Same retirement account. Completely different nervous system.


Big Things Are Overrated

Waiting for something big to look forward to is often just perfectionism wearing a sensible cardigan. We tell ourselves the next big milestone will fix everything, when in reality, progress usually happens in a game of inches. Small choices, taken consistently, create big shifts. Direction beats intensity every time. 


As I wrote in my last blog about my Everest Base Camp and MBA journey:

Even Cs get degrees.

And I'll add:

Consistent B- work wins most races.


Small counts:

• weekly plans

• standing dates

• tickets bought months ahead

• regular commitments


Anticipation is hope with a calendar invite.


The H³ Framework for a Happy Retirement


(Hope. Help. Horizon.)

All three regulate the nervous system and keep us engaged.


Hope — I can still shape things

Help — I'm useful and connected

Horizon — My life has forward motion


If life feels flat, add one from each column. That's the prescription.


Retirement isn't just about slowing down. It's about re-wiring.


In plain English: You are not done yet!


Remember, hope keeps you engaged. Giving back keeps you grounded. Looking forward keeps you light. 


Or, translated: A happy retirement isn't passive. It's practiced.


A Note for Those Supporting Older Relatives


If you have aging parents, relatives, or friends in your life, be on the lookout for signs of depression, resignation, or apathy. The signs are obvious if you're paying attention: flat affect, repetitive complaints, withdrawal, that vague sense they're just going through the motions, or their smile doesn't reach their eyes.


Here's what not to do: point it out directly or suggest they "find a hobby" or "volunteer somewhere."


Here's what does work: create Hope and Horizon by scheduling regular outings—lunch, a walk, a movie, anything with a date attached. Sometimes we underestimate how much seniors look forward to our visits and connections. It's better than any tonic or medication to lift spirits, young and old.


In this scenario, action speaks louder than words. Talking about depression often brings up shame and further withdrawal. Instead, think of love as a verb, not a noun.


You don't need to fix anything. Just show up. Regularly. Predictably.


No grand gestures. No reinvention required. Just presence with a pulse - and notifications on mute!


Be that person!


Don't retire. Re-wire.

— Sue


Want more of this? Subscribe for weekly doses of retirement reality—no golf-cart clichés, no sunset stock photos, just straight talk about staying Hip, Fit & Financially Free.  Subscribe Here


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Sue Pimento

Sue Pimento

Founder | CEO

Focused on financial literacy and retirement strategies. Authoring new book on home equity strategies to help seniors find financial freedom

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For families, it's about showing up, listening, and laughing together. Because one day, those elders' stories will become yours. And you'll want someone to care enough to hear them, too. So let's make this season count. Let's call more, visit more, and laugh more. Let's honor the past while making new memories. And let's remember that the best traditions aren't the ones that stay the same—they're the ones that adapt, evolve, and keep bringing us together. Now pass the eggnog. The spiked kind. Let's All Sit Under the Mistletoe and Sing the Retired Remix of "Jingle Bells" (To the tune of "Jingle Bells") Dashing through the snow, With a walker all in tow, To the mall we go, Moving nice and slow! Family's out of sight, Texting through the night, Oh, what fun it is to Zoom My grandkids once a night—hey! Chorus: Jingle bells, jingle bells, jingle all the way, Oh, what fun it is to chat With friends who won't delay—hey! Jingle bells, jingle bells, laughter saves the day, Lonely hearts can still feel joy— If love just finds a way. Happy holidays, everyone. May your turkey be moist, your family be present, and your eggnog be strong. Want more insights like this? Subscribe to my free newsletter here, where I share practical strategies, real-world stories, and straight talk about navigating retirement with confidence—not confusion. Plus, all subscribers get exclusive early access to advance chapters from my upcoming book. For Canadians 55+: Get actionable advice on making your home equity work for you, understanding your options, and living retirement on your terms. For Mortgage Brokers and Financial Professionals: Learn how to become the trusted advisor your 55+ clients—it's your opportunity to build lasting relationships in Canada's fastest-growing demographic. Sue Don’t Retire…Re-Wire! References & Resources for You or a Loved One On Loneliness and Social Isolation: • U.S. Surgeon General. (2023). Our Epidemic of Loneliness and Isolation: The U.S. Surgeon General's Advisory on the Healing Effects of Social Connection and Community. https://www.hhs.gov/sites/default/files/surgeon-general-social-connection-advisory.pdf • Medicare FAQ. (2024). Loneliness in Seniors Statistics: Combating Social Isolation. https://www.medicarefaq.com/blog/senior-loneliness-statistics/ • Mayo Clinic. (2023). Loneliness and Social Isolation Through the Holidays. https://newsnetwork.mayoclinic.org/discussion/loneliness-and-social-isolation-through-the-holidays/ On Depression and Mental Health: • Kok, R.M., & Reynolds, C.F. (2020). The association between loneliness and depressive symptoms among adults aged 50 years and older: A 12-year population-based cohort study. The Lancet Psychiatry. https://www.thelancet.com/journals/lanpsy/article/PIIS2215-0366(20)30383-7/fulltext • Cigna. (2021). The Loneliness Epidemic Persists: A Post-Pandemic Look at the State of Loneliness Among U.S. Adults. On Traditions and Rituals: • Oregon Counseling. Why Traditions Matter to Mental Health. https://oregoncounseling.com/article/why-traditions-matter-to-mental-health/ • Care365. Maintaining Traditions with Seniors. https://www.care365.care/resources/maintaining-traditions-with-seniors Additional Support: • National Council on Aging. Four Steps to Combat Loneliness in Seniors During the Holidays. https://www.ncoa.org/article/four-steps-to-combat-loneliness-in-seniors-during-the-holiday-and-beyond/ Emergency Services If the situation is urgent or someone is in immediate danger: Call 911. Canada Suicide Prevention Service (CSPS) • Call: 1-833-456-4566 (available nationwide, 24/7) • Text: 45645 (evenings) • Chat: available at 988.ca

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In an earlier post I laid out one of the foundational blocks of your retirement defense system: the "Cash Wedge" - that boring-but-brilliant cushion of cash, GICs, and T-Bills that protects you from selling investments when markets wobble. The Cash Wedge is the mild-mannered superhero of your retirement plan. It buys you time, flexibility, and peace of mind, as it gives you permission to wait for markets to recover—  Now if you missed Part 1, go back and give it a quick read here. For Canadian homeowners — especially those whose wealth is mostly in their property — there are additional options that allow you to use your equity as a second buffer, dramatically strengthening your financial resilience.  How Home Equity Strategies Can Help You Create a Backup Wedge for Retirement Here's the risk that catches thousands off guard: sequence-of-returns risk combined with home equity concentration. Translation: While you own your home, you encounter problematic market conditions early in retirement while withdrawing, and your options narrow quickly. Author Wade Pfau's research demonstrates that home equity can serve as a "buffer asset," shielding investments during economic downturns. Instead of selling investments when markets are down, it might be smarter to temporarily access a pre-arranged HELOC or reverse mortgage. Once markets recover, you can repay the credit line. This isn't debt panic — it's strategic damage control. Warren Buffett's Wisdom Applied to Canadian Retirement As an investor, Warren Buffett is the epitome of control and discipline. His now famous quote rings true in these times. “The stock market is a device for transferring money from the impatient to the patient.” Translation for retirees: Keep dry powder. Own quality investments. Don't chase fads. And stop looking for the bottom — nobody knows where it is until it's in the rear-view mirror. The Canadian "Brick-and-Mortar" Retirement Strategy Listen up, homeowners. Canadians whose retirement plan is pretty much: buy a home, pay it off, and repeat; "we're mortgage-free" with pride. This strategy is very common and effective. But let's be honest: if your home is part of your retirement plan, economic changes matter even more. If you’re in this camp, you need to accept the facts and plan how you'll use your equity to secure your retirement. It’s better to have a ready, aim, fire approach than the more typical fire, ready, aim! When markets decline, central banks often cut rates. Lower rates can support real estate — but they don't guarantee rising prices. Meanwhile, inflation drives up costs, buyers' budgets fluctuate, property values can soften, and retirees feel the impact most quickly. Even a modest dip in home values creates real erosion in net worth when your home carries the bulk of your financial future. The Case for Securing Home Equity Access Now It's much easier to qualify for credit when home values are higher, finances are stable, and you're not already in a pinch. Your options: Home Equity Line of Credit (HELOC) This includes products like Manulife One: Competitive rates and flexible options — but retirees often face income qualification barriers. Reverse Mortgage: No income needed, no payments required. Plus, the No Negative Equity Guarantee — you can never owe more than your home is worth — but retirees dislike debt! HESA (Home Equity Sharing Agreement): You get cash now in exchange for sharing a percentage of your home's future appreciation. No monthly payments, not technically debt, but you give up a share of future gains. This isn't about needing money today. It's about safeguarding your future from having to sell, downsize, or rely on credit card debt because the economy experienced a mood swing. It's insurance — with a door handle. Building Your Cash Wedge: Step-by-Step Calculate 12–24 months of living expenses. Select where to store each layer (high-interest Savings Account, cashable GICs, T-Bills). Refill the wedge with income from dividends, distributions, or planned draws Monitor your situation closely.  If your income is tight: consider arranging a home-equity line or reverse mortgage as a backup wedge - not an emergency scramble. Review annually — cost of living changes, inflation changes, and so should your wedge. The Bottom Line for Canadian Retirees The real question isn't "Do I need a Cash Wedge?" It's "Can I afford NOT to have one?" Retirees have limited capacity to earn income to cover shortfalls. Budgets can tighten unexpectedly. Inflation doesn't seek permission. And sometimes the thing we think we'll never need becomes the lifeline that secures our retirement. Your retirement security comes from: Owning quality investment Building reliable dividend income Preparing smart home-equity backstops Keeping emotions out of financial decisions Avoiding saving too much while living too little The Cash Wedge is the most boring tool in your retirement plan — and the most powerful. Yet most financial plans ignore it.  Don't. Sue Don’t Retire… ReWire!!! Want to become an expert on serving the senior demographic? Just message me to be notified about the next opportunity to become a "Certified Equity Advocate" — mastering solution-based advising that transforms how you work with Canada's fastest-growing client segment.

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