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The Light That Lasts: Exploring the Meaning and Magic of Hanukkah

Hanukkah may not be the biggest holiday in Judaism, but culturally it’s one of the most recognizable — a celebration of resilience, identity, family, and (let’s be honest) some of the world’s finest fried foods. Behind the candles and the dreidels is a deeper story that continues to resonate across generations, especially in a time when conversations about cultural identity, belonging, and freedom are front and centre. Where It All Begins: A Miracle of Light in a Time of Darkness Historically, Hanukkah commemorates the rededication of the Second Temple in Jerusalem around 164 BCE after the Jewish people, led by the Maccabees, revolted against oppressive rule. When they reclaimed the Temple, tradition says only one day’s worth of purified oil remained — yet it burned for eight days. This “miracle of the oil” inspired the festival: eight nights of light triumphing over darkness, both literally and symbolically. Cultural Significance: A Celebration of Identity and Resilience Hanukkah stands as a powerful reminder of: Religious freedom — the right to practice one’s traditions openly Perseverance in the face of adversity The strength of cultural identity and community While it is not one of Judaism’s major holy days, its timing in the winter — often alongside Christmas — has made it a cornerstone of Jewish visibility in North America and worldwide. For many families, the holiday carries a warm mix of pride, heritage, and continuity: a chance to tell stories, honour ancestors, and reinforce cultural roots in a rapidly changing world. The Festive Side: Food, Family, Flame… and Spinning Tops Hanukkah traditions vary around the globe, but common themes include: Lighting the Menorah Each night, families add one more candle, filling homes with increasing brightness — a powerful metaphor for hope and persistence. Fried Foods Potato latkes, sufganiyot (jelly-filled doughnuts), fritters — all fried to commemorate the oil of the miracle. Dieticians everywhere look the other way. Dreidel Games The spinning top (nun, gimel, hey, shin) is tied to historical stories of Jewish children studying Torah in secret. Today it’s mostly about bragging rights and chocolate coins. Gifts and Gatherings Gift-giving is a more modern tradition in some regions, influenced by cultural exchange with North American holiday norms. Looking for an angle or Story? Hanukkah in a multicultural society — how Jewish visibility shapes community identity The Maccabees and modern conversations about resistance and resilience Evolving Hanukkah traditions across the global Jewish diaspora Food as cultural storytelling — the symbolism of oil in holiday cuisine The rise of public menorah lightings and interfaith holiday events How Hanukkah has been portrayed in pop culture — and why representation matters Why Hanukkah Still Resonates Today Hanukkah is more than a ritual of candles — it’s a celebration of survival, spirit, and cultural pride. In a world where communities continue to navigate questions of identity, inclusion, and tradition, the Festival of Lights offers a meaningful lens on perseverance and the enduring human drive toward hope. Connect with an expert today! Journalists exploring religion, culture, family traditions, or seasonal celebrations can connect with Hanukkah scholars, Jewish studies experts, cultural historians, and community leaders on ExpertFile for interviews and deeper insights. Find your expert here: www.expertfile.com

Playing "Ketchup": Kraft Heinz, Food Industry Work to Meet Evolving Consumer Trends

In September, the Kraft Heinz Company revealed its intention to split into two smaller entities—one focused on in-demand products, like shelf-stable meals, spreads and sauces, and the other on slower-growth businesses, such as the Oscar Mayer, Kraft Singles and Lunchables brands. The move is among the latest in a series of breakups and spinoffs announced by major "Big Food" conglomerates, including Kellogg's, Keurig Dr Pepper Inc. and Unilever, and experts speculate more divvying and downsizing are bound to follow. Beth Vallen, PhD, a professor in the Villanova School of Business who studies consumer behavior and food marketing, contends these demergers and restructurings are the direct result of a recent yet significant shift in shoppers' spending habits. "It is certainly a possibility that we are moving away from 'Big Food,'" says Dr. Vallen. "The companies are likely to be more agile as smaller entities, and the more targeted businesses will allow them to focus on their different market segments as we face increasingly complex consumer and macro trends in the food industry." Among the more noteworthy factors the professor cites are changes in how shoppers evaluate products and how often they make purchases, particularly amid rising costs, economic pressures and increased competition in the marketplace. When it comes to groceries, a LendingTree survey from earlier this year found that nearly nine in 10 Americans are reassessing what items they cart to the checkout lane. "Inflation and uncertainty have driven consumers to look for more value when they shop," says Dr. Vallen. "This might result in behaviors like switching to lower-cost alternatives, and along these lines, consumers are seeking out retailers with high-quality store brand offerings that might replace their typical, branded items. "Consumers are also shopping less frequently. This could be due to reliance on technology, like online grocery purchases, which requires more planning, as well as a desire to make groceries stretch between purchases to save money." Another development affecting the industry is a broader drive across the population toward health-conscious options and low-calorie meals, heightened to a degree by the rise of GLP-1 drugs like Ozempic. A recent KFF Health Tracking Poll evidences that these medications, which have been shown to promote weight loss, are taken by roughly one in eight American adults; and households with users are expected to account for more than a third of food and beverage sales by 2030. According to Rebecca Shenkman, MPH, RDN, LDN, the director of the MacDonald Center for Nutrition Education and Research at Villanova's M. Louise Fitzpatrick College of Nursing, the impact of these drugs' usage on consumers' eating habits should not be underestimated. "GLP-1 receptor agonists reduce appetite and food intake through multiple mechanisms, and evidence suggests both a reduction in snacking frequency and a shift toward healthier choices among users," shares Shenkman. "They report fewer cravings for sweet, salty and fatty snacks, particularly during the first 12 to 24 weeks of treatment. In addition, consumer surveys and clinical trials indicate increased intake of fruits, vegetables and water, and decreased consumption of processed foods and sugary beverages. "With millions of users and average daily reductions of 700 to 900 calories, demand for calorie-dense snacks could decline significantly." Among the brands and businesses at greatest risk, in Dr. Vallen and Shenkman's respective estimations, are "packaged and processed foods" as well as "sugary beverages and high-fat treats." In turn, with shoppers increasingly moving away from these "unhealthy" options and expressing an openness to dispensing with long-term staples, companies in the sector will need to emphasize adaptability in the coming years, making a conscious effort to understand customers' distinct preferences and needs. "Altogether, there are numerous trends that are seemingly pulling consumers in different directions—between health, taste, value and convenience," concludes Dr. Vallen. "Looking ahead, it will be important for firms to understand how these trends impact different consumers—and in different categories. Health likely means something different to Gen X and Gen Z and may vary further based on whether we are talking about a family dinner or a late-night treat. Taking efforts to understand consumer motivations will be crucial for companies to appropriately respond to current trends."

Tinsel, Tears, and Turkey: How Seniors Really Feel About the Holidays

Ah, the holidays. That magical season when cinnamon fills the air, grandkids are glued to their phones, and you're wondering if it's too early to spike the eggnog. (Answer: it's 5 o'clock somewhere, and that somewhere is your kitchen.) For many older adults, the season is a cocktail of nostalgia, joy, and melancholy—served in a glass rimmed with memories of when the house was full, and the turkey wasn't store-bought. Dealing With The Ghosts of Christmas Past The holidays used to mean full houses, laughter echoing off the walls, and more food than a Costco freezer aisle. Now? Smaller gatherings, missing faces, and a nagging feeling that you're somehow in the way at your own celebration. There's a certain ache that comes with the holidays as we age. It's not just arthritis—it's memory. The people who made our holidays special might no longer be around, and while their photos still grace the mantle, their absence can hit harder than a fruitcake to the forehead. It's the quiet that gets you. The stillness of a home that used to hum with chaos. The microwave hums where the oven once sang. The Christmas card list has ghosted us—literally—replaced by e-cards that can't be hung on the fridge or hugged. And yet, despite the ache, many seniors keep the traditions alive. They polish the silver, bake the cookies, and set the table—because ritual matters. It's a way to say, I'm still here, and this still matters. Loneliness: The Fear No One Talks About Let's name the holiday elephant in the room. Yes, it turns out that one really is the loneliest number. It's that heavy feeling that sneaks in right around the time commercials start showing perfect families in matching pajamas (who, let's be honest, probably fought about those pajamas in the parking lot). The numbers tell a sobering story: A report by the National Institute on Ageing, finds that as many as 41 per cent of Canadians aged 50 years and older are at risk of social isolation and up to 58 per cent have experienced loneliness before. The holidays often bring additional pressure for many.  It's important to note, you don't have to live alone to feel lonely.  Seniors often fear being forgotten—left out of the group chat, the dinner invite, or even the conversation at dinner. Some feel like a burden, convinced their presence is more "obligation" than "invitation." That fear of irrelevance can creep up faster than fruitcake at a church bake sale. The internal dialogue doesn't help: "They're busy." "They have their own lives." "I don't want to be a bother." But here's the truth: you're not a bother. You're the keeper of stories, the family's living archive, and—let's face it—the only one who actually knows how to carve a turkey without creating a crime scene. The health stakes are real: According to a 2023 research report from the U.S. Surgeon General, loneliness and social isolation have a profound effect on mortality, equal to smoking 15 cigarettes per day. That’s more impact than obesity or sedentary lifestyles. It's associated with increased risk of heart disease, stroke, dementia, depression, and anxiety. This isn't just about feeling blue; it's about actual health outcomes. When Depression Wears a Santa Hat Holiday depression doesn't always look like tears and tissues. Sometimes it's withdrawing from events, skipping meals, or not bothering to decorate. It's saying "I'm fine" with a smile that doesn't reach your eyes. A prominent research study of seniors in the UK over a 12-year period published in The Lancet,  confirms what many seniors experience: loneliness is a significant predictor of depression in older adults. The study found that higher loneliness scores were consistently associated with increased depression severity. The relationship works both ways—people with mental health conditions are more than twice as likely to experience loneliness. It can also show up physically—fatigue, poor sleep, or that vague feeling that something's just... off. The sparkle of the season fades under the weight of grief, change, or just the exhausting pressure to be merry when you're not feeling it. A few sad moments are natural. We all get a little misty when "White Christmas" plays for the 47th time. But if the blues linger past Boxing Day, it might be time for a gentle check-in—with a friend, a doctor, or someone who actually listens (not just nods while scrolling). Remember: asking for help isn't a weakness. It's wisdom. And honestly? It's badass. The Magic of Rituals and Traditions For seniors, traditions aren't just habits—they're anchors. The same decorations, the favorite songs, the "don't touch that, it's Grandma's angel" moment that happens every. Single. Year. Research shows that rituals and traditions provide crucial psychological benefits for older adults, including a sense of stability, purpose, and belonging. They offer structure and comfort during challenging times, helping seniors feel grounded and connected to their roots. Studies have found that maintaining traditions contributes to overall mental well-being and can even reduce symptoms of anxiety and depression.  These rituals offer stability in a world that keeps changing at warp speed (seriously, when did voice-activated ornaments become a thing?). But when traditions fade—when no one asks for the shortbread recipe or the ornaments stay boxed—it can feel like being erased in real time. So here's the trick: Evolve the traditions. Pass the torch, not the guilt. Let the grandkids lead carols (even if they insist on adding Mariah Carey). Use the good china. Pull out the silverware stored in the wooden case under the china cabinet that hasn't been opened since 1987. Keep the spirit alive, even if it looks different now. How Seniors Can Create a Joyful Holiday (Yes, Really!) Reach Out First: Don't wait for others to make the first move. Call, text, or—even better—show up with cookies. People are often grateful for the invitation but also afraid to impose. Be the one who breaks the ice. Host a Mini Gathering: Even if it's just tea with a neighbor, connection is the best seasoning of all. Bonus: smaller gatherings mean less cleanup and more actual conversation. Volunteer: Nothing lifts the spirit like helping someone else. Food banks, shelters, and local schools welcome extra hands. Plus, it's a great reminder that you're still needed—and you are. Laugh on Purpose: Watch old comedies. Tell those same stories (again). Laughter really is medicine—no prescription, no co-pay required. Decorate Anyway: Even if no one's visiting, do it for you. Light up your space, and your mood might just follow. And if the neighbors think you're overdoing it? Even better. What Families Can Do (Besides Show Up Hungry) Here's your holiday homework, families: Visit More, Scroll Less. You can't hug over FaceTime. And honestly, Grandma's WiFi probably can't handle it anyway. Listen Like It's a Gift. Because it is. Let seniors share their stories without rushing them or checking your phone. They're not just repeating themselves—they're reliving joy. (And yes, you've heard it before. Listen again.) Include Them in the Chaos. Let Grandma wrap presents, Grandpa set the playlist, or Aunt Sue take charge of... okay, maybe not the gravy. But give them a role. Purpose is the best present. Check In Regularly. A quick "thinking of you" text can mean more than an expensive gift. Though, to be fair, both are nice. Respect Their Pace. Big gatherings can be overwhelming. Sometimes small and meaningful beats loud and crowded. Not everyone wants to do the Macarena at Christmas dinner. (Looking at you, Uncle Bob.) Remember: the greatest present you can give an older adult is presence—yours. The Importance of Joy (and How to Find It Again) Joy doesn't always come in grand gestures. Sometimes it's hiding in the small stuff: • The smell of pine needles • The first snowflake (before it turns into gray slush) • That old ornament you swore you'd throw out • The laughter of family—even if it's at your expense Joy isn't found lying around like loose change. It's made. Sometimes it's coaxed out with a memory, a song, or a well-timed bad joke about Aunt Sue's lumpy gravy. And if all else fails, remember this: you've survived decades of holidays. Burnt turkeys. Broken ornaments. That unfortunate incident with the glue gun in 2003. You've earned the right to laugh through the tears and dance in your slippers if you damn well feel like it. The Real Gift The holidays remind us that connection—not perfection—is the true magic. For seniors, it's about being seen, heard, and loved. For families, it's about showing up, listening, and laughing together. Because one day, those elders' stories will become yours. And you'll want someone to care enough to hear them, too. So let's make this season count. Let's call more, visit more, and laugh more. Let's honor the past while making new memories. And let's remember that the best traditions aren't the ones that stay the same—they're the ones that adapt, evolve, and keep bringing us together. Now pass the eggnog. The spiked kind. Let's All Sit Under the Mistletoe and Sing the Retired Remix of "Jingle Bells" (To the tune of "Jingle Bells") Dashing through the snow, With a walker all in tow, To the mall we go, Moving nice and slow! Family's out of sight, Texting through the night, Oh, what fun it is to Zoom My grandkids once a night—hey! Chorus: Jingle bells, jingle bells, jingle all the way, Oh, what fun it is to chat With friends who won't delay—hey! Jingle bells, jingle bells, laughter saves the day, Lonely hearts can still feel joy— If love just finds a way. Happy holidays, everyone. May your turkey be moist, your family be present, and your eggnog be strong. Want more insights like this? Subscribe to my free newsletter here, where I share practical strategies, real-world stories, and straight talk about navigating retirement with confidence—not confusion. Plus, all subscribers get exclusive early access to advance chapters from my upcoming book. For Canadians 55+: Get actionable advice on making your home equity work for you, understanding your options, and living retirement on your terms. For Mortgage Brokers and Financial Professionals: Learn how to become the trusted advisor your 55+ clients—it's your opportunity to build lasting relationships in Canada's fastest-growing demographic. Sue Don’t Retire…Re-Wire! References & Resources for You or a Loved One On Loneliness and Social Isolation: • U.S. Surgeon General. (2023). Our Epidemic of Loneliness and Isolation: The U.S. Surgeon General's Advisory on the Healing Effects of Social Connection and Community. https://www.hhs.gov/sites/default/files/surgeon-general-social-connection-advisory.pdf • Medicare FAQ. (2024). Loneliness in Seniors Statistics: Combating Social Isolation. https://www.medicarefaq.com/blog/senior-loneliness-statistics/ • Mayo Clinic. (2023). Loneliness and Social Isolation Through the Holidays. https://newsnetwork.mayoclinic.org/discussion/loneliness-and-social-isolation-through-the-holidays/ On Depression and Mental Health: • Kok, R.M., & Reynolds, C.F. (2020). The association between loneliness and depressive symptoms among adults aged 50 years and older: A 12-year population-based cohort study. The Lancet Psychiatry. https://www.thelancet.com/journals/lanpsy/article/PIIS2215-0366(20)30383-7/fulltext • Cigna. (2021). The Loneliness Epidemic Persists: A Post-Pandemic Look at the State of Loneliness Among U.S. Adults. On Traditions and Rituals: • Oregon Counseling. Why Traditions Matter to Mental Health. https://oregoncounseling.com/article/why-traditions-matter-to-mental-health/ • Care365. Maintaining Traditions with Seniors. https://www.care365.care/resources/maintaining-traditions-with-seniors Additional Support: • National Council on Aging. Four Steps to Combat Loneliness in Seniors During the Holidays. https://www.ncoa.org/article/four-steps-to-combat-loneliness-in-seniors-during-the-holiday-and-beyond/ Emergency Services If the situation is urgent or someone is in immediate danger: Call 911. Canada Suicide Prevention Service (CSPS) • Call: 1-833-456-4566 (available nationwide, 24/7) • Text: 45645 (evenings) • Chat: available at 988.ca

Christmas Magic on Screen: A Curated List of Must-Watch Holiday Classics

Christmas movies and TV specials hold a special place in the hearts of many, offering a blend of nostalgia, joy and fun that captures the magic of the holiday season, creating a sense of togetherness, drawing families and friends around the glow of the television. James Kendrick, Ph.D., a film historian and professor of film and digital media at Baylor University, has curated a list of his Top 5 Christmas movies and specials, sharing the history of how they became holiday classics sure to fill you with holiday cheer. View his profile 1. It’s a Wonderful Life Frank Capra’s classic is the perennial Christmas movie, which is only fitting given that it began with writer Philip Van Doren Stern penning a short story called “The Greatest Gift” and printing it on 200 holiday cards that he sent to friends and family. Although initially a box office dud, it later fell into the public domain and was used by PBS stations during the 1970s as December counterprogramming, turning it into the holiday classic it always deserved to be. Along with stockings hung by the fireplace, decorated trees and blinking lights on the house, the viewing of “It’s a Wonderful Life” has become indelibly interwoven into contemporary Christmas tradition. Capra weaves a rich tapestry of American life filling the screen, including memorable details and wonderful performances from James Stewart in his first role after returning from duty in World War II, and Donna Reed, then a largely unknown contract player. It is a truly classic, timeless film, one of the few that quite simply never grows old. 2. Die Hard It is a long-settled matter that Die Hard is not just a Christmas movie, but one of the very best. Christmas movies, after all, know no genre, so there is no reason why a violent action film can’t fit the bill for the holidays. The decision to set John McTiernan’s wry action extravaganza against a Christmas-season backdrop only adds to the film’s myriad pleasures, as it makes Bruce Willis’s one-man mission to eradicate a crack team of terrorist-robbers all the more imperative after they take a Los Angeles high-rise hostage along with a party of business executives that include his estranged wife. “The fact that the soundtrack includes as many jingle bells as gunshots (well, maybe not quite as many, but still more than a few) only adds to the seasonal feels,” Kendrick said. 3. A Christmas Story Somewhere inside we are all young, round-faced Ralphie, pining away for our own “official Red Ryder carbine action, 200-shot Range model air rifle with a compass in the stock and this thing which tells time.” The film’s stroke of brilliance in how it ladles halcyon American nostalgia – so many images from the film could have been painted by Norman Rockwell – with a biting sense of cold, but often hilarious, reality. Humorist Jean Shepherd, parts of whose 1966 semi-autobiographical short story collection, In God We Trust: All Others Pay Cash, provided the film’s source material, narrates the film with a mix of humor and irony, making each scene work as both an evocation of a specific time and place in American history and a blank slate onto which we can project our own Christmas memories and dreams. The fact that the genuine, child wonderment of waking up on Christmas morning co-exists so easily with sneering bullies, creatively cursing fathers, draconian teachers, tongues frozen to light poles, inappropriate major awards and the always braying Bumpass hounds is testament to the film’s breadth and depth. 4. A Charlie Brown Christmas The first and best of the Peanuts TV specials (sorry, Great Pumpkin), A Charlie Brown Christmas premiered in 1965 and has been in our hearts ever since. While technically not a feature film, it captures in its brisk 22 minutes both the truth of the Christmas spirit and the attendant interpersonal difficulties of the holiday season. The fact that it does so with such good humor and poignancy means that no Christmas viewing list is complete without it. Charlie Brown’s oft-frustrated attempts to fit in and find meaning in the season amid all the crass commercialism is one of pop culture’s greatest evocations of existential struggle, but all the low points are balanced perfectly with Linus’s simple, illuminating recitation of the annunciation to the shepherds from the Gospel of Luke, which remains remarkably powerful in its unadorned directness. From the mouth of babes, indeed. 5. National Lampoon’s Christmas Vacation This is the movie for everyone who has ever tried their absolute hardest to live up to the hype of the Christmas season, only to end in abject failure. Maybe we haven’t all crashed and burned as badly as poor Clark Griswold does here, but we can all relate to how the idea of a “good ol’ fashioned family Christmas” doesn’t always comport with the realities of family, especially when your family includes the inveterate Cousin Eddie, who thinks nothing of emptying his rusting hulk of an RV’s chemical toilet into a storm drain first thing in the morning while wearing a shorty robe and smoking a cigar. John Hughes’s screenplay is a veritable compendium of modern America’s expectations for the season and how they can all go terribly, horribly wrong, which is enough to make anyone feel better about their own Christmas turkey coming out too dry or inability to find which lightbulb is causing the whole strand to go dark.

School’s Out, Screens Are In: Why Your Kids Copy Your Phone Habits on Winter Break

When the bell rings for winter break, most parents worry their kids will “disappear into their phones.” What often goes unmentioned? The adults usually disappear into theirs first. New behavioral data from Offline.now, the digital wellness platform founded by author Eli Singer, shows we now spend about 10 of our 16 waking hours on screens, roughly 63% of our day. Kids off school are simply mirroring the digital norms they see at home. Executive Function Coach and child development specialist Craig Selinger says winter break is less a test of kids’ willpower and more a test of family norms: “If you want behavior change in kids, start with the parent model. A 12-year-old will not put their phone away at dinner if their parents won’t.” Selinger points to what he calls the “mobility problem”: what used to be a TV in the living room is now a device in your child’s pocket. “Mobility makes tech sticky - there’s no natural ‘show’s over’ when Minecraft and TikTok never end.” Offline.now’s experts note that high, especially late screen use is tied to disrupted sleep and next-day behavior in children and teens, exactly when parents say, “They’re monsters over break.” Selinger’s work with families suggests the answer isn’t banning devices outright, but changing what kids see adults do with theirs. When parents put phones in a basket at meals, leave devices out of bedrooms, and actually join “old school” activities: cooking, board games, hands-on hobbies, kids’ attention and confidence start to rebound: “Micro-independence beats micromanagement. If you engineer small wins off-screen - a 20-minute task kids can complete without their phone - you rebuild their real-world confidence one brick at a time.” Key message for journalists: Over winter break, the real story isn’t just “kids are on their phones all day.” It’s that adult behavior quietly sets the ceiling on what’s realistic for children. The most effective “screen-time rule” is the one parents are willing to follow themselves. Featured Expert Craig Selinger, M.S., CCC-SLP - Executive Function Coach and child development specialist (Brooklyn Letters), focused on how kids actually learn and how digital dependency affects attention, writing, family systems, and school success. Expert interview availability can be arranged through Offline.now’s media team.

Stress-Free Holiday Gatherings Made Simple

Holiday gatherings often bring a mix of joy and challenges, especially when navigating complex family dynamics. Anticipating potential hurdles, such as sensitive topics or interpersonal tensions, can help family members approach these events with confidence and clarity. Baylor University communication expert Allison M. Alford, Ph.D., researches adult daughtering, invisible labor and family relationships and emphasizes the importance of preparation to ensure a more relaxed and enjoyable experience for everyone over the holidays. She shares five practical tips to help families navigate the holidays with ease: Dr. Allison Alford’s Five Family Tips for a Stress-free Holiday 1.Work out known hurdles before you arrive to the holiday event. Family dynamics often have predictable friction points – whether it’s a difference in political views, sibling rivalries or unresolved conflicts. Identify these hurdles in advance and decide how to approach them. “For instance, if you anticipate a certain topic will come up, plan a calm response or rehearse setting a boundary,” Alford said. “If you’re traveling with a partner or children, discuss how you’ll handle challenging moments as a team. The goal is to minimize surprises and feel equipped to manage potential stressors.” 2.Come prepared with a list of topics you’re ready and willing to talk about (and off-limits subjects, too!). Having a mental (or physical!) list of neutral or positive conversation topics can keep the mood light and engaging, Alford said. “Think about shared hobbies, family memories or recent accomplishments,” she said. “At the same time, identify subjects that are off-limits for you – like contentious debates or sensitive personal matters – and practice polite ways to redirect or deflect those conversations. For example, you could say, ‘I’d rather not get into that today. Tell me about your new garden!’ Preparation is key to feeling in control of the dialogue.” 3.Set a mantra for your intention. Repeat often. Alford suggests anchoring yourself with a phrase or saying that aligns with your values and goals for the event. For example, “I will stay calm and kind,” or “I am here to connect, not to control.” Repeat this mantra to yourself whenever you feel stress creeping in. “It acts as a mental reset and helps you respond intentionally rather than react impulsively. Over time, this practice can shift your mindset and create a buffer against family tension,” Alford said. View her profile 4.Take breaks when you feel things going off the rails. Recognizing when you’re overwhelmed is a vital skill. If emotions are running high, excuse yourself for a breather. A short walk, stepping outside for fresh air, or even taking an extended “bathroom break” can provide the time you need to decompress and regroup. “Use this break to practice deep breathing, text a supportive friend or simply enjoy a few moments of solitude. Returning with a clearer head can prevent escalation and help you maintain your composure,” Alford said. 5.Stand up for your needs. Don’t abandon yourself! While family gatherings often involve compromise, Alford said it’s important not to sacrifice your emotional well-being. If a situation feels uncomfortable or hurtful, express your needs calmly but firmly, she said. For example, “I feel uncomfortable when this is discussed. Let’s talk about something else.” “Prioritize your mental health and remember that it’s okay to say no, step away or leave early if necessary. Standing up for yourself sends a clear message that your feelings matter and reinforces healthy boundaries,” Alford said. By addressing known hurdles in advance, curating conversation topics, setting personal intentions and taking mindful breaks when needed, Alford said family members can create a buffer against tension and foster meaningful connections. “At the same time, standing up for your needs and setting boundaries helps preserve your emotional well-being,” she said. “With these strategies, you’ll be better equipped to approach holiday events with confidence and calm.”

Navigating Grief During the Holiday Season

The holiday season is a time of joy, togetherness and celebration, but for many – especially those who are grieving the death of a loved one or a deep loss – it can bring a complex mix of emotions, ranging from sadness and sorrow to gratitude and joy. Baylor University professors Candi Cann, Ph.D., a death scholar and associate professor of religion in the Honors College, and Jo-Ann Tsang, Ph.D., a leading gratitude researcher and associate professor of psychology, offer four strategies for people experiencing difficult emotions and grief during the holidays. Embrace the spectrum of emotions Both Tsang and Cann say the key to maintaining balance and authenticity – even while deep in grief – is understanding and accepting where you are emotionally. “It’s possible and normal to feel different emotions at one time,” Tsang said. “You can feel happiness during the holidays, but also sad that you miss someone who you wish were present. Being grateful does not rule out feeling other emotions; we can cultivate gratitude, but that does not necessitate running away from other emotions.” Cann pointed out that grief can be complicated if the death or loss is from a difficult relationship. “It is okay to feel relief in addition to grief and it is important to validate all of your feelings – it’s a complicated grief because it was a complicated relationship,” Cann said. The importance of self-care Self-care is vital during this time, Cann said. She encourages grieving people to stay active, eat healthy, go outside to be in nature and get enough sleep. “It’s totally normal to need more sleep when you're depressed and grieving. You just have to be gracious with yourself about that,” Cann said. Allowing ourselves to feel emotions like stress, sadness or grief gives us insight into what we value and “can motivate us to take some time for self-care,” Tsang said. Acknowledging that we are stressed might lead us to reach out to others for help with tasks that overwhelm us or to let go of things to reduce stress. In addition to taking care of your physical health, staying engaged in your community or church and being in community with others is beneficial for mental health, Cann said. But at the same time, be honest with yourself about what you want to do and only accept invitations or participate in activities that you feel you can handle, she added. The place of gratitude Tsang suggests approaching challenging emotions with gratitude as it “might also provide context and perspective for our loss and potentially transform our negative emotions.” “As an example, I might feel frustrated that I am sad but then feel grateful that I have good family and neighbors to check on me and coworkers to help me finish the tasks that I can’t do while I’m down,” Tsang said. “This gratitude might help reduce my frustration by helping me see the support that is present in my life, on which I had not previously reflected.” At the same time, she reiterated that, in addition to cultivating gratitude, it’s important for people to permit themselves to experience negative emotions such as grief and sadness in response to life circumstances. “It’s okay if it’s hard to experience gratitude. God meets us where we are,” Tsang said. Evaluate traditions and embrace memories Cann suggests evaluating family traditions, choosing those that are most important to continue and starting new traditions that include their loved one. “A lot of people feel like when that person is gone, the love is gone too, but the love is still there,” Cann said. “You wouldn't feel the grief or the big hole that you now have if you didn't have all of this love in the first place.” She suggests embracing their loved one’s presence by including a place at the table for Christmas dinner, making their favorite recipe or finding other ways to continue the bonds. By doing these things, “you're including them in your conversation, and you're making space for that person, both literally and symbolically,” Cann said. Supporting someone who is grieving Being supportive of someone grieving requires patience and vulnerability. “Engage with the person and ask how you can best support them, and let them know that you are thinking about them during this time,” Cann said. Sometimes, friends or family members don’t want to bring up death during the holidays because they don't want to make people sad at a joyful time. “But the point is, they already are sad, so bringing it up allows them to express it” and feel accepted in their pain, Cann said. It also is important to remember that not all grief is related to death. There are many types of loss that people experience such as divorce or disease. The Baylor researchers note that we can’t decide or predict what defines another person's grief, but we can offer love and support. Approaching the holidays when experiencing grief over a death or a deep loss may be painful at first, but using these strategies can help us face the future by celebrating with gratitude what we had in the past. Ultimately, the holidays are a time for reflection, connection and self-compassion. Allow yourself to feel your emotions fully – whether joyful, challenging or a mix of both – and use them as guides for meaningful action. Looking to know more or arrange an interview? Simply click on the expert's icon below or contact: Shelby Cefaratti-Bertin today.

Violence alters human genomes for generations, researchers discover

In February of 1982, the Syrian government besieged the city of Hama, killing tens of thousands of its own citizens in sectarian violence. Four decades later, rebels used the memory of the massacre to help inspire the toppling of the Assad family that had overseen the operation. But there is another lasting effect of the attack, hidden deep in the genes of Syrian families. The grandchildren of women who were pregnant during the siege — grandchildren who never experienced such violence themselves — nonetheless bear marks of it in their genomes. Passed down through their mothers, this genetic imprint offers the first human evidence of a phenomenon previously documented only in animal models. The genetic transmission of stress across multiple generations. “The idea that trauma and violence can have repercussions into future generations should help people be more empathetic, help policymakers pay more attention to the problem of violence,” said Connie Mulligan, Ph.D., a professor of Anthropology and the Genetics Institute at the University of Florida and co-senior author of the new study. “It could even help explain some of the seemingly unbreakable intergenerational cycles of abuse and poverty and trauma that we see around the world, including in the U.S.” While our genes are not changed by life experiences, they can be tuned through a system known as epigenetics. In response to stress or other events, our cells can add small chemical flags to genes that may quiet them down or alter their behavior. These changes may help us adapt to stressful environments, although the effects aren’t well understood. It is these tell-tale chemical flags that Mulligan and her team were looking for in the genes of Syrian families. While lab experiments have shown that animals can pass along epigenetic signatures of stress to future generations, proving the same in people has been nearly impossible. “Resilience and perseverance is quite possibly a uniquely human trait.” —Connie Mulligan Mulligan worked with Rana Dajani, Ph.D., a molecular biologist at Hashemite University in Jordan and co-senior author, as well as anthropologist Catherine Panter-Brick, Ph.D., of Yale University, to conduct the unique study. Dajani envisioned the research project; because of her intimate knowledge of the Syrian population and its tragic history, she designed the study to cover three generations of Syrian refugees to Jordan. Some families had lived through the Hama attack before fleeing to Jordan. Other families avoided Hama, but lived through the recent civil war against the Assad regime. The team collected samples from grandmothers and mothers who were pregnant during the two conflicts, as well as from their children. This study design meant there were grandmothers, mothers and children who had each experienced violence at different stages of development. A third group of families had immigrated to Jordan before 1980, avoiding the decades of violence in Syria. These early immigrants served as a crucial control to compare to the families who had experienced the stress of civil war. Study coauthor Dima Hamadmad, a Syrian researcher and the daughter of refugees, led the search for families that met the study criteria and collected cheek swabs from 138 people across 48 families. "The participants took part in the research out of love for their children and concern for future generations,” she said. “But more than that, they wanted their stories of trauma to be heard and acknowledged.” Back in Florida, Mulligan’s lab scanned the DNA for epigenetic modifications and looked for any relationship with the families’ experience of violence. In the grandchildren of Hama survivors, the researchers discovered 14 areas in the genome that had been modified in response to the violence their grandmothers experienced. These 14 modifications demonstrate that stress-induced epigenetic changes may indeed appear in future generations in humans, just as they can in animals. The study also uncovered 21 epigenetic sites in the genomes of people who had directly experienced violence in Syria. In a third finding, the researchers reported that people exposed to violence while in their mothers’ wombs showed evidence of accelerated epigenetic aging, a type of biological aging that may be associated with susceptibility to age-related diseases. Most of these epigenetic changes showed the same pattern after exposure to violence, suggesting a kind of common epigenetic response to stress – one that can not only affect people directly exposed to stress, but also future generations. “We think our work is relevant to many forms of violence, not just refugees. Domestic violence, sexual violence, gun violence: all the different kinds of violence we have in the U.S,” said Mulligan. “We should study the effects of violence. We should take it more seriously.” It’s not clear what, if any, effect these epigenetic changes have in the lives of people carrying them inside their genomes. But some studies have found a link between stress-induced epigenetic changes and diseases like diabetes. One famous study of Dutch survivors of famine during World War II suggested that their offspring carried epigenetic changes that increased their odds of being overweight later in life. While many of these modifications likely have no effect, It’s possible that some have functional effects that can affect our health, Mulligan said. The researchers published their findings, which were supported by the National Science Foundation, Feb. 27 in the journal Scientific Reports. While carefully searching for evidence of the lasting effects of war and trauma stamped into our genomes, Mulligan and her collaborators were also struck by the perseverance of the families they worked with. Their story was much bigger than merely surviving war, Mulligan said. “In the midst of all this violence we can still celebrate their extraordinary resilience. They have persevered,” Mulligan said. “That resilience and perseverance is quite possibly a uniquely human trait.”

Trim the Clutter, Keep the Cheer

The holiday season brings warmth, joy and a touch of magic into our homes, but it also can bring excess clutter, waste and energy consumption, making it hard to feel festive. However, there are simple and creative ways to decorate sustainably without sacrificing the festive spirit. Baylor University human sciences and design professor Elise King, M.I.D., M.A., an expert in interior design and built environments, says embracing sustainable decorations, changing to energy-efficient lights, eliminating clutter and reducing waste can help maintain a tidy, eco-friendly home – and create a holiday atmosphere that resonates with joy and meaning. “The holidays can often feel busy and stressful, so it’s helpful to focus on traditions and decorations that bring joy and add meaning to the season,” King said. By taking simple steps to reuse materials, reduce energy consumption and focus on what matters most, families can celebrate the season with both heart and mindfulness, King said. Decorating sustainably One of the easiest ways to approach sustainable decorating is by reusing or repurposing materials you already have or finding decorations at resale shops. "Upcycling items from thrift stores or turning last year’s Christmas cards into garlands are simple and creative ideas," King said. “Beyond thriftiness, these practices add a personal and nostalgic touch to decorations.” King also said that it is important to consider the lifecycle of a product, beyond just being recyclable. "Also consider elements such as durability/longevity, manufacturing processes, transportation, energy consumption and disposal,” she said. “I recommend people make the best-informed decisions they can, while also remembering not to let it become overwhelming. Switch to LED Christmas lights Changing from incandescent to LED Christmas lights is good for both style and sustainability. LED lights reduce energy usage, are more durable and typically last longer than incandescent. Plus, they have come a long way over the past few years. “The criticism used to be that LEDs had a blue hue and were ‘cold’ compared to incandescent,” King said. “That isn’t really the case anymore. You have to be particular about what you purchase, but several companies offer lights that are virtually indistinguishable from vintage lights.” A clutter-free peaceful mindset While holiday decorations create a festive touch around the house, they can add to the clutter and busyness, which ultimately takes away the joy, King said. Decluttering and organization can help create a peaceful environment. “Most people enjoy Christmas decorations, but over the years we tend to accumulate a lot of them,” King said. “Sadly, for many, the thought of decorating for Christmas no longer brings feelings of excitement and joy. Instead, we dread going into the attic, dragging out the tree and boxes of ornaments, checking strands of lights, fixing broken bulbs, etc., only to know that we’ll have to put it all back in about a month. "Keep decorations that bring joy and let go of what no longer feels fulfilling can make a big difference in decreasing the excess while emphasizing what is important to you and your family," she said. By clearing both physical and mental space, families can better prioritize the activities and moments that truly matter. Reducing paper use It can be difficult to go fully paperless because of gift wrapping, but there are ways to reduce paper in the holidays from reusing materials or gifting experiences. “You can reuse paper shopping bags or even cut up the bags or other paper you have around the house and wrap gifts,” King said. Gifting experiences rather than physical items is another growing trend. “I find that many people are interested in receiving or gifting experiences, which can also reduce wrapping needs,” King said. “Not only does this minimize waste, but it also emphasizes shared moments over material possessions.” King noted that since COVID, there has been a trend to go paperless and people tend to be more comfortable with virtual communication and remote collaboration in general, which can also eliminate the need for Christmas cards and other paper products.

Ape Ancestors and Neanderthals Likely Kissed, New Analysis Finds

Kissing occurs in a variety of animals but presents an evolutionary puzzle: it appears to carry high risks, such as disease transmission, while offering no obvious reproductive or survival advantage. Despite kissing carrying cultural and emotional significance in many human societies, up to now researchers have paid little attention to its evolutionary history. In the new study, “A comparative approach to the evolution of kissing,” published this week in the journal Evolution and Human Behavior, the researchers carried out the first attempt to reconstruct the evolutionary history of kissing using a cross-species approach based on the primate family tree. The results indicate that kissing is an ancient trait in the large apes, evolving in the ancestor to that group 21.5 – 16.9 million years ago. Kissing was retained over the course of evolution and is still present in most of the large apes. The team also found that our extinct human relatives, Neanderthals, were likely to have engaged in kissing too. This finding, together with previous studies showing that humans and Neanderthals shared oral microbes (via saliva transfer) and genetic material (via interbreeding), strongly suggests that humans and Neanderthals kissed one another. “While kissing may seem like an ordinary or universal behavior, it is only documented in 46% of human cultures,” said Catherine Talbot, co-author and assistant professor in the College of Psychology at Florida Tech. “The social norms and context vary widely across societies, raising the question of whether kissing is an evolved behavior or cultural invention. This is the first step in addressing that question.” Matilda Brindle, lead author and evolutionary biologist at Oxford’s Department of Biology, said: “This is the first time anyone has taken a broad evolutionary lens to examine kissing. Our findings add to a growing body of work highlighting the remarkable diversity of sexual behaviors exhibited by our primate cousins.” To run the analyses, the team first defined what constitutes a kiss. This was challenging because many mouth-to-mouth behaviours look like kissing. Since the researchers were exploring kissing across different species, the definition also needed to be applicable to a wide range of animals. They therefore defined kissing as non-aggressive, mouth-to-mouth contact that did not involve food transfer. Having established this definition, the researchers collected data from the literature on which modern primate species have been observed kissing, focusing on the group of monkeys and apes that evolved in Africa, Europe and Asia. This included chimpanzees, bonobos, and orangutans, all of which have been observed kissing. They then ran a phylogenetic analysis, treating kissing as a ‘trait’ and mapping this to the family tree of primates. They used a statistical approach (called Bayesian modelling) to simulate different evolution scenarios along the branches of the tree, to estimate the probability that different ancestors also engaged in kissing. The model was run 10 million times to give robust statistical estimates. Stuart West, co-author and professor of evolutionary biology at Oxford, said, “By integrating evolutionary biology with behavioral data, we’re able to make informed inferences about traits that don’t fossilise – like kissing. This lets us study social behaviour in both modern and extinct species.” While the researchers caution that existing data are limited – particularly outside the large apes – the study offers a framework for future work and provides a way for primatologists to record kissing behaviors in nonhuman animals using a consistent definition.